"The life of every man is a diary... a diary in which he means to write one story but he writes another. And so it is with my dear daughters. When I was a very young man I wished to have five wonderful daughters, and what do I have? I have two stoned biker nymphomaniacs, one sadomasochistic queen, and you Doreen are the biggest diesel dyke I've ever seen in my life. So all I really have left is you Cindy... you are my last hope in this world." Nikki Charm lights up the screen as the beloved daughter whose birthday coincides with her ravenous desire to lose her virginity.

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